Body Confidence and Strength After 60: A Personal Journey
Discover how I went from feeling ashamed and unseen to building strength, confidence, and body trust in midlife—with the help of a compassionate trainer. Here lifting 60lbs.
Gifts and Gratitude
Before sitting down to write this week, I’d been catching up on my journal entry for today. I wrote about feeling incredibly blessed, a bit more than usual this week with gifted coaching sessions, a visit from one of my besties over the weekend, and an invitation from my personal trainer, Jenn, to contribute to a promotional video for her new fitness program specially designed for those of us in midlife and beyond.
On my way to the gym on Wednesday, I rehearsed the kinds of things I might say:
how grateful I am for Jenn’s work and patience with me as I’ve navigated arthritic knees and the energy ebbs and flows of a wonky thyroid,
how I’ve been welcomed into an environment that I wasn’t always comfortable in as a larger woman with varying degrees of body image issues,
how my confidence has grown as a result of having a trainer who is knowledgeable, who understands the importance of holding a safe space for me physically as I gain strength, but more importantly who has an interest in learning what I need, who I am, and how to support MY body.
I chatted with a few people before being invited to sit in front of the camera - I was to begin by introducing myself before telling my story about my relationship with exercise and the gym, my fitness goals and what I appreciated about the gym community and working with Jenn.
It seemed so easy.
Have you ever found yourself thinking you’re Ok one minute and then the next your throat tightens as you hold your breath, praying the tears dry up before flowing rapidly, before anyone notices red eyes, and the blatant fact that you feel like you’re losing the plot?
What Triggered Emotions and Tears
As I sat down and looked at the camera, I couldn’t stop the emotion or the tears from welling up. For what seemed like an eternity, twice during the interview I had to pause and take some deep breaths.
What was it about this interview that triggered my emotions and a few tears? I’ve been in plenty of interviews and facilitated in front of large and small groups without so much as a tear in sight!
As I reflect back, I was surprised at how intensely I felt moved - this moment was bigger than I’d realized. I was excited about helping Jenn promote this new program but hadn’t stopped to consider that there might be a deeper layer to explore.
Writing in my journal, I was remined of a time when I was about 8 years old, feeling devastated and ashamed that I was the last person to finish a charity walk/run - all my friends reached the finish line hours before me.
Fitness in Midlife - More Than Just Strength Training
And yet now, decades later, I was being asked to talk about why and how fitness, strength and walking are important to me.
I realized the significance of being seen and valued, albeit decades later; the little girl who believed she was a failure at anything fitness or body- related can finally feel proud of the woman she’s become.
A Trainer Who Sees the Whole Person
My emotion was also about feeling deep gratitude for Jenn, who’s helped me unravel beliefs about my body and its capabilities. She’s helped me create the evidence I’ve needed to know that when I meet myself where I am and get out of my own way, my body is stronger than I could ever have imagined.
Jenn has taught me that there’s more than one way to increase strength and build a sustainable program. She’s shown me how flexibility and an experimental mindset works in the gym:
a little tweak here and there,
a shift in where to put my attention on my body as I lift a heavier weight,
permission to push myself or take a break, to use a lighter or heavier weight, or none at all.
Injured? No problem - let’s work the parts of you that are injury-free.
Not in the gym? There are a lot of options to work on - at home or outside.
Jenn’s walked beside me through all my efforts to break free from the diet trap and encouraged me to check in with WHY movement and exercise is important to me.
Midlife Fitness and Health Goals Beyond the Scale
Today, it’s about being stronger as I age and move into my 70’s and beyond; it’s about preparing for a trip next year to the UK and being able to carry my backpack, walk, hike with more ease, and have the energy to travel from place to place.
I hope that despite my emotion there are parts of my interview that are usable in the promotional video - but if not, it’s been a privilege to have been invited.
I’ve walked away with more motivation to continue my journey with weight loss and health improvements. And, as the tortoise and not the hare, I’m living proof that healing is possible in midlife and beyond.
Are You Ready to Start Your Own Healing Journey?
What type of movement or exercise suits you? Who in your life supports you, encourages you to expand and grow? Are there parts of you that could do with some healing?
If you’d like to explore your next steps, or are ready to make some changes but feel stuck in the “messy” middle, let’s connect. We don’t have to go it alone.
Thanks for reading,
Joan
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