Friendship

Dec 1

Two of my favorite, most cherished friends left after a 5 day visit. Today my home is quiet, filled with memories I’ve made sure to write down so I won’t forget. There are a few things in life that are of true value - friendship is one of them.

I’ve never had lots of friends but those I feel deeply connected with are truly a gift and have stood the test of time. My buddies and I have known each other for more than 40 years - it seems incredible to me that we’ve been able to stay involved with each other’s lives despite distance and the challenges that have been thrown at us. And yet, it is because of all the messiness and obstacles that we’ve experienced, more than ever, we’ve needed each other over time.

In 5 short days, we filled our souls with love and compassion with and for each other, present no matter the concern. I count on these women to challenge me, to ask hard questions, to help me sort things out when my body and mind feel like it’s all too hard. Life is better knowing we have each other’s backs.

Mid-life arrives with an understanding that time isn’t as infinite as we once thought it was. No, we understand now that time zips by without a second thought and it is with this in mind that we see each other in ways we may not have before today, value each other and our history together more than yesterday.

We see our aging bodies and chuckle at knees that pop when we stand up. We understand of the impact of unwanted conditions which have unfairly invaded our bodies and lives. We hold the space more deeply for any and all feelings, old and new. And, we count on one of us saying something funny at just the right moment to put it all into perspective.

We know what it’s like to move through time and gather our stories, placing them securely in a history book within our minds, ready to share and share again with each other.

There’s nothing quite like the friendship we women can create. It’s a safe space to test ideas, to share our truths, to say what’s on our minds - out loud, to cheer and celebrate the successes, to extend a hand when things feel hard, to laugh with abandon at something silly, to cry with ease when we share our shame or joy.

Where would I be without you, dear friends? Where would we be without each other?

There’s more I could write but I’ll stop here and end with this from Rumi:

“I love my friends
neither with my heart nor with my mind.
Just in case…
Heart might stop.
Mind can forget.
I love them with my soul.
Soul never stops or forgets.”

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Thanks for reading.

Joan