Can There Be Order in Chaos?
I spent time at my grandson’s music class yesterday, a gift to me as a woman in midlife, a grandma who treasures these moments not having had grandmothers in her life to attend classes, concerts or games.
And, as I write this I realize some of you reading my post may not be a grandmother – no worries, there’s more to this story, a message for all of us whether in midlife or not to take away. It just happens that I learned the lesson I’m about to share with again through my grandson and his music class.
I love attending this fun-filled, busy, energetic, music class for toddlers “and their adults”, as the teacher says. I admire the teacher as she sings, dances, and somehow manages to keep the class moving, alternating lively energetic songs with calmer, softer tunes.
The time goes quickly as she shifts from one song to another, sometimes bringing toys out to go along with the song, sometimes using her body, clapping, gesturing, making sounds to guide these little people, encouraging them to move, using their bodies to dance, run, bang on drums or shake a tambourine, bounce a squishy ball and then to “shhhhhhh”, become as quiet as a mouse.
I love that our little guy meets me in the parking lot and immediately begins chatting while taking my and his mom’s hands. In the past, he’s sometimes held back during the class, perhaps a little shy – until the drums come out and then there’s no stopping him!
But this week he was full on, running up and down, ready to dance, and pretend to sleep when the teacher sang the quiet song. Make it stand out
The patience this teacher has is amazing, but what I love the most is her understanding of how these little people work and what they need to thrive during her class.
When she asks the children to return their toys, she holds the bag or box open but adds that if they’re not ready, it’s ok – they’re given permission to hold onto it and return it when ready. The ease at which they do, usually in time for the next activity or bunch of toys she places in the middle of the circle, inviting them to choose the ones they’re drawn to, is natural.
She gives them permission to let go in their time.
Our little drummer has often held onto his drum, drumming as songs are sung until the end when the teacher sings goodbye to each child. He then picks up the drum and takes it to her, releasing it of his own accord. There’s never push back or resistance from these little people – some return the toy immediately, ready to move on, but for others, sometimes they just need a bit more time…
The teacher sits on the floor as she plays her mandolin engaging with a couple of the children who want to strum the strings for her – she lets them, each taking turns as she wraps her smiles and beautiful singing voice around them until they’ve had enough and are ready to focus on something else.
It’s all facilitated with ease despite the appearance of chaos and the noise of children and adults talking and singing, not always at the same time or in unison.
This teacher is a master at creating order within chaos. I marvel at her ability to shift and flow while holding steady, facilitating her process that allows these little people to grow, gain confidence through movement and song, express themselves with total acceptance of their abilities and stage in life.
What a gift she has and what an opportunity for me to watch this chaotic order unfold and learn once again that I/we can hold onto something until we’re ready to release it and sometimes we need to give ourselves permission to hold it just a bit longer.
It’s that space between holding and releasing, allowing us to sort through the chaos, coming to a place of order where we can release what no longer serves us, what we don’t need now, all with more ease and confidence, when we’re ready.
Thank you for reading. What lesson did you take away from this music class?
If you’d like to join me in writing about this and other topics, I create weekly therapeutic/reflective writing prompts in The W.I.S.E.R. Woman’s Guide, sent to you on Sundays. To join, you can subscribe HERE.
Thank you!
Joan
